Doctor Chunkenstein

Me: "While we're here could you check out Beau's rash?"
Evan: "Yeah, Doc, she's narrowed it down to heat rash or ruebella."
Doc: "Really? The German Measles? That's pretty rare!"
Me: cutting my eyes at my husband "Ahhahahaha, nooooo, I mean.....the internet and all."
Evan: "Yes she has time to diagnose everything using the internet" as he throws me a gottcha look.
Doc: "Yeah...that looks like a little eczema. Just put a little moisturizer* on him."

Touche Evan...until next time!

*Side note: every time we put moisturizer on him one of us sings "It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again". Beau is going to watch "Silence of the Lambs" one day and go, "Hey I know that...what the...?" We have to grow up!

Doctor Chunkenstein has been bumped up to six ounces every 3-31/2 hours since he weighed in at 15 lbs. 12 ounces. This is how that went down:

Doc: "WHAT is he eating?" said sort of incredulously.
Me: "Similac Sensitive...YOU put him on it" said accusingly.
Doc: "Well how much is he eating?"
Me: "Four ounces every 2 hours."
Doc: "OK...so he's eating what... 7 times a day?"
Evan: "Hahaha! No, try between 9 and 11."
Doc: "Why don't we think about bumping him up to 6 ounces? And you should make him cut out that middle-of-the-night feeding...just let him cry it out."

You had me until cry Doc...

After that they proceeded to give Little Man four shots and another immunization orally. He was stoic...pretty much...after the initial OMG sharp-stabby-things-in-my-legs wail. After that it was all like, "That was all you got. I laugh at you...now let me sleep...after you give me some more of that grape it-no-hurt-no-more medicine."

So he's in the 95th percentile for weight gain. At first I'm all YAY, my baby got an A...a 95. Then it's like ooooohhhhh for gaining weight in record time, ahem. He's 75th percentile for height and head...this means a C...he's average...right on track. I think...I honestly don't know exactly what these percentiles mean but I am really trying NOT to research it on the internet.