Sleep Little Baby

My inbox has been flooded with "helpful" advice on getting your child to sleep on their own at three months old. So since I've a little extra time on my hands I decided to do a little internet research...first mistake. While researching how to get your child to let you sleep more than a two hour stretch, I've also been able to narrow down Beau's rash on his neck to either heat rash or rubella. This is the conclusion I came to after the better part of a wasted morning. So it only makes sense that the info on sleep will be equally disturbing and make me feel less of a mother. Oh, and apparently Beau got a cold because I didn't breastfeed and formula is a witch's brew made by the devil. Nice! I digress...

Here is the issue at hand- the books say that it is wrong to rock Beau until he is asleep then put him down in the room with us. So let me take a second to clear up the "where Beau sleeps" issue. He has his own room with his own beautiful furniture and crib that belonged to Baylee... a crib that Evan and I put together wrong. Not completely wrong...just the all important dropside part. So before I knew it was put together backwards, I thought it was old, faulty and was convinced it had been recalled b/c whenever I leaned on the side...WHABAM...down it went. In my mind I had decided that Beau would either grow up in the travel bed or I would have to secretly replace the crib because Evan thinks I have lost my mind. Since those two options were out I called the manufacturer and left messages, but nothing. Finally I found a website with an email address and explained the issue. Finally Brandy with Crib4Life emailed back and said "No it wasn't recalled" and attached a set of instructions for putting the crib together, because you know when all else fails...read the instructions. Ahaaa...we had the dropside on backwards...boy, did we feel stupid! We turned it around and magically it clicked into place...whew! Then I noticed it...when we put it on backwards, we had forced the all important plastic part to the dropside in the wrong direction...the part that if it fails causes babies to suffocate. Evan looked at what I was obsessing over this time, rolled his eyes, and said (big exhale of breath), "It's fine, but if it will make you feel better to order a new part, do it." I replied, "No, if you think it is OK then..." as I eyed it warily. The next day I ordered the part after I read on the internet about a dropside malfunctioning and suffocating another baby. He loves it when I do "research". He once asked where I came up with all my "information"...I told him "the books" and now I think he's trying to stay one step ahead of my freak flag by reading articles and chapters before me. Good luck to him...

Once the part gets here for the crib that issue is settled. Then we move on to the Beau part of the equation. Everyone says that you should put your baby down when he is still awake. Hahaha! So here is Beau's take on that-a big fat NOPE! He can be dead to the world asleep, limp arms and snoring, but the minute that you get up from the LaZBoy and head down the hall he will open one eye and cut you a look like, "Hey lady, where d'you think you're goin'?" If you happen to make it down the hall, around the corner, manage to kick the cat out of the way AND get into the room, he'll most likely wake up as his bum hits the sheet. You just have to stand completely still and pray to the sleep gods that he doesn't open his eyes and see you standing there frozen in fear. Because if he sees you, it's back to the LaZBoy for round two of rock-walk-kick cat-pray.

So this whole idea of him soothing himself to sleep, or worse the Cry It Out Method, has me wondering...do parents actually do this or are most like me and just kind of snort in disbelief and move on?

I luv mah finners!

This was a weekend full of firsts for Beau. I think he would say, if he could talk, that the most important thing is that he found his right hand which is full of fingers that he can shove into his mouth. Since he can't talk, we(mostly Evan)have given him a voice and for some odd reason he can't pronounce the "g" in "fingers" it comes out "finners". As in, "These are the best tastin' finners in the whole world." Now this coming from two teachers who constantly correct people's grammar and who swore up and down that they were not going to baby talk their child...we didn't want him growing up saying things like "finners". So now we will most likely have a child who says "finners" along with the detested "passie". He'll also know his diaper as a "diapey", his bottle as a "ba ba" and think his name is "Fart Blossom" or "Toots McGee". Ahhhh, we've become those parents.

On to the "finners". I love the fact that he is so enamored with them that he trys to cram his whole hand into his mouth which in turn makes him gag. He will then look surprised like, "Hey...why'd you do that?" then he'll do it again. Heaven help us when he figures how to get just his thumb in his mouth!

Beau decided this weekend that his infant carrier known to us as a "papoose" is NOT a torture device meant to make baby boys scream in terror and fear. It is, he discovered, a pleasant way to enjoy the outdoors and an even better way to get Mommy to hold you all day long while she does chores like laundry. Its unfortunate that he looks like he's in a neck brace though.

Because it was so nice out this weekend we hauled out the massive stroller and off we went on our first shopping extravaganza. Beau absolutely loved it...granted he slept most of the time given the sleep inducing qualities of the stroller which are very similar to the car. He enjoyed entertaining the masses at Red Robin while he scarfed down four ounces, burped loudly, and smiled like he had accomplished something. The man at the table next to us let me know on his way back from the bathroom with his kids in tow that Beau's diaper change was going well..."Thanks sir! Glad my husband and son haven't fallen in!".

There was a small SNAFU in Wal-Mart...we didn't plan well and Beau needed to be fed...then, RIGHT THEN PEOPLE! So yes, I will eventually get over the shame of having to give my son a bottle in Wal-Mart...at least it was the nicer Wal-Mart in Columbus. I mean, I didn't see anyone there with Sponge Bob pj's tucked into rain boots escorting his mother/girlfriend?? who didn't see the need to put her teeth in that day. So I knew we were in an upscale Wal-Mart...hopefully too many cooties didn't jump onto his bottle. When we finally made it home Evan looked at me and said, "I haven't been this tired since the first night in the hospital." No kidding...now all we have to do is feed him three or four more times, bathe him, and rock him until we fall asleep!

Hell Hath No Fury...

like me saying my child is feeling better. Time: 12:30 p.m. Place: bed What: a cough Here's how it went down. Evan wakes me up, "He's coughing. I think he's choking on something." Me, scrambling out of bed in a sprint to snatch up my child with an incredulous look on my face that said, "Well, are you gonna let him choke?" Then everyone woke up and realized...the cold was back. Ahhhhh, great, just GREAT! I begin my tirade that starts out, "I HATE DAYCARE....." when Evan stopped me and says, "I don't think it was daycare. He was only there a couple of hours." Here is his hypothesis: it was the Cough Heard 'Round the World(see previous post). Oh snap! Lemme just shut my mouth and go get the antibiotics for my baby.

Even though the cold is back we did get some cute pics of him yesterday...enjoy!

Never, Ever Wake a Sleeping Baby...NEVER

I am finally updating the blog now that Beau is feeling better. I didn't want to be redundant with the whole: Feb. 8- sick, Feb. 9- still sick, Feb. 10-wait...yep, sick.

To summarize I took my mom's advice: "Just keep taking him to the doctor until they do something!". It worked- antibiotics are miraculous AND Beau loves bubble-gum flavor. He sucks it down and gives me a look as if "Is that all you got lady?". He finished his rear-end cream today...we're happy to say the rear is clear! So all is looking up for the little man. It probably helped that he didn't go to daycare Friday or Monday. Now, he returned to daycare today so it could all go to hell in a matter of hours...fingers crossed everyone!

On to the subject of my post-my precious, sleeping angel and the evil one who woke him.. Beau has just gone down for the night...9:30...thank you Sweet Jesus! Evan and I are are ecstatic as we quietly and quickly throw on PJ's and dive into bed. I am fighting a cold so I walk into the bathroom, get a tissue, quietly blow my nose, open the door...quiet as a mouse...and then it happened...I coughed. Not even a loud cough, more like I cleared my throat...a mere hiccup. And he's up...party's over! The whimpering started. Thank you all for coming! I cringed when I saw the look on my husband's face...he was actually considering domestic partner abuse. He continued to shoot me murderous looks as he threw back the covers, got Beau, and stalked out to the living room. I felt really bad...seriously I did! I said I was sorry several times as I climbed into bed and turned off the lamp. I even apologized again when he brought a sleeping Beau back to the room and said, "Shhhhhhh, just go back to sleep.".

Fast forward to early morning. Beau still sleeps in the room with us (you can just save your "he-should-be-sleeping-in-his-own-room" comments...he still sleeps in our room...end O'discussion). Evan can't sleep without the TV on and I have become accustomed to the light the TV provides. This morning at 4 a.m. on the dot after I had put Beau down after a feeding, Dish Network rebooted it's system. This caused our TV, which was turned up to 13, to emit a looouuuddd poltergeist-ish white noise scream which caused Evan and I to jump up and scramble, fighting through covers and pillows for the remote which was lost in the bed. He found it first and desperately mashed the volume button until the TV was quiet. We sat there panting quietly and eyeing each other accusingly as if to say, "Why did you have the TV up so loud?" Neither of us said a word we just turned to Beau because surely he was awake...I mean he startles when the cat poots. Nope...sound asleep...arms overhead, legs spread, snoring. I guess the lesson here is to get him to go to sleep we should just go 'round banging pots and pans and whisper when we need him to wake up...never will I understand.

Day Care Woes

Yep, Beau was in day care one day...count it....ONE freakin' day...and got THE.WORST. COLD. EVER. Since he's only seven weeks old we erred on the side of caution and schlepped him to the pediatrician yesterday. Diagnosis: cold. Treatment: not a whole heck of a lot. One thing the doc did say was to watch his temp and if it gets above 100.5 call and take him to Pediatric Afterhours.

Now I spent a lot of time and effort choosing the perfect thermometer for Beau. We spent a considerable amount of dough on a fancy number that has interchangeable parts depending on how you want to take his temp with a handy-dandy carrying case and all that hot jazz. It's digital and reads temp at the speed of light. Fabulous! So last night when he wouldn't eat and got all fussy I took his temp (rectally thank you very much) and almost passed out when it read 100.4. Evan said to calm down and retake it when Beau had a chance to calm down. I did at which point it read 101.7. That's when we both almost fell out. Away we went to Afterhours (apparently you get the star treatment when you have a 2 month old running a temp...we were taken to the "private" waiting room).

Beau was ushered in to have his temp read...wait for it...99.7 as he giggled and smiled for the nurse. That's my child! So apparently we own an expensive and crappy thermometer. We stopped by Walgreens on the way home and bought the $5 one that was recommended. NICE! I love that hot feeling of embarrassment that washes over you as the nurse and doc give you THAT look.

Oh, and thank you day care...as if you aren't expensive enough...now we have some doctor bills to add to the tally. YEA!